How to Replace the Chaos in Your Home With Order
Truly I could have written those very words ten years ago, except that I had four kids. I was literally at the end of myself. I, too, felt like such a failure. I know I'm going to sound like a broken record here, but the first thing the LORD did was to get me into a regular, consistent time alone with Him. This has been the foundation of my day for the past ten and a half years. He is life! It is "the necessary part" that Jesus said would not be taken away from Mary. I do not know how I survived the first ten years of my marriage and motherhood without time alone with the LORD every morning. No wonder I finally reached the breaking point.
You know what is interesting? My son, Brady, told me that they had 30 minutes a day on his trip in Mississippi to get alone with the LORD. (He was gone nine days, as I mentioned before.) He told me that he felt so close to the LORD after getting alone with Him consistently for nine days. Consistent communication is the crucial in any relationship, especially our First Love. We need to listen to Him (The Word) and talk to Him ( Prayer) every day.
Now as many of you know, my early morning time alone with the LORD is at 4:00 a.m. I started getting alone with Him at this time when I had a three week old nursing baby and three young children. It was the most difficult time of my life to begin learning how to get up early. Real early! I had never seen that time of the day on purpose before. And I usually fell asleep on the LORD for the first couple of months, but I kept persevering, and I kept showing up. To this day. I chose this time because it was the only hour of my day that I could be all alone since I homeschool and my husband gets up at 5:30 a.m.
Women used to get up much earlier than they do now. I don't think when they read the words, "She rises before dawn" back in the 30's or 40's that they winced like women do now. I know my great grandmother was a very early riser. But we've slacked off over the years, and I was no exception. As I said before, this is where the LORD started me. Early mornings in His Word. Then I had to learn how to work early after that. He truly is incredible strength.
"I love you, LORD, my strength." Psalm 18:1
I do believe my days were all out of whack ten years ago because I used my time most unwisely. More than most women. I got up very late. Then I was on the phone ridiculously long during the morning and into the day. In the stores far too much. Watching sinful soap operas in the afternoon. Reading steamy fiction late into the night. And I would start thinking about dinner around 3:00 p.m. with the meat usually frozen. Bad, bad habits that cost us a lot of time and money. Proverbs 31 seemed like a dream to me. I was excellent at blaming everyone else or circumstances while not facing my own sin and inadequacies caused by it.
"Love not sleep, lest you come to poverty; open your eyes and you shall be satisfied with bread." Proverbs 20:13
"He also that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster." Proverbs 18:9
"In all labor there is a profit, but the talk of the lips tendeth only to poverty." Proverbs 14:23
"She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness." Proverbs 31:27
So for a couple of years now, I have been practicing the Flylady's routines (www.flylady.net) after my early morning time with the LORD. I actually started two years ago in May. For months I just listened to her. I had to assimilate everything before I could figure out exactly how she was managing her house and her time. I copied lots of her directives and started a Control Journal, which is basically a personal notebook of household management that she suggests keeping. It is so wise. Because if I was managing a K-Mart, for example, I would have a plan for the week in some sort of notebook. Now I have one for my own home.
Well, here we are two years later, and this is the summer that I was determined to practice her entire plan before starting another school year. I called it "Harvesting My Time." I am really trying to learn how to be fruitful with my time for the benefit of my family. And I've learned that I can take my habits with me wherever I go. Isn't that cool? I so want godly habits as taught in Proverbs 31. So for the entire summer thus far, I have been harvesting my time and practicing the Flylady's entire plan. You know what? It works! It is the first plan that I have consistently practiced which works great for me. I can hardly wait for the school year to begin with all I've learned to put into practice this summer. It's been such a profitable summer. (Which is why I have been slack in writing. ~Smile~ Harvesting your time is quite a learning experience.) I'm going to try to explain it to you in hopes that it will be as much of a help to you as it has been to me. You will need to check out the website (www.flylady.net) if you are unfamiliar with the Flylady's household management system. It will help you to understand what I am saying here. She does use some things that I don't agree with, but I just pluck out the gold and cast off the chaff. Here's what I've plucked out:
My entire household plan is on four big note cards. One of them being blue. The blue card is the first card which holds my foundational chores. These are things I have learned to do first off in the morning.
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Blue Card:
1~ Bible study & Prayer: 4:00 a.m. - 5:30 a.m.
2~ Get dressed from head to toe.
3~ Lay out my clothes for tomorrow.
4~ Declutter for 15 minutes while listening to praise music.
5~ Shine my sink.
6~ Get my bread machines started.
As I said before, spending time with the LORD is the most necessary part of my day. And the only reason I can do any of this! He is definitely my strength. I often tell Him, I'm standing on the outside because I'm kneeling all day on the inside. Jesus Christ is the Master of My Moments.
I never thought getting dressed from head to toe was important, but I sure do now! I also find wearing sneakers very important, as the Flylady teaches, right off in the morning. And laying out my clothes for tomorrow was something my grandmother always practiced. Now I can see why. I am so much faster in the morning with my clothing selection all ready for me.
Decluttering for 15 minutes each day is so important. I am learning to have a place for everything, and everything in its place. Just like Gram! So I go through each room rather quickly putting things back where they go and tossing anything that needs tossing. I am still working on this and by no means have it down. But things are so much better.
Shining my sink is such a daily practice that I don't even think about it anymore. It's definitely a habit. And it has surely helped me to keep my sink area cleaner. My sister-in-law just recently visited after a year apart. When she saw my kitchen she said, "Laine, I can see your counters!" All that harvesting of my time has paid off. ~Smile~
I personally added the part about getting my bread machines started, because they have to be going early in the morning for me to have bread by dinner time. As many of you know, I only use the dough cycle and hand shape my bread. It's the most wonderful servant!
Once I have completed this blue card, I turn this card over and start on the next, which is my morning routine.
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First White Card: Morning Routine
1~ Swish down the bathroom.
2~ Tidy the living room.
3~ Make my bed and tidy our room.
4~ Start a load of laundry.
5~ Sweep the front patio and tidy.
6~ Sweep the back patio and tidy.
7~ Dust mop the kitchen.
8~ Dust mop the hallway.
9~ Write the kids' chore list.
10~ Set up coffee pot, tea, & vitamins for tomorrow.
11~ Get breakfast started.
12~ Get dinner started.
13~ 15 minutes in my zone for the week.
My goal this summer was to be done with my foundation (blue card) and my morning routine (white card) by 9:00 a.m. when I begin school. It is a work out each day for me to stretch myself a little more. I am oftentimes done my first two cards before 9:00 a.m. and then start working on my "To Do List" (which I will explain later). One of my secrets is to have my phone off for this crucial morning time. My whole day is so much smoother if my morning time is wisely used as the foundational part of each day. Also, I work harder on Monday and Friday to have the weekend free with my husband. I don't work out at a gym or run in my neighborhood, rather I work out really fast in my house. I get my heart pumping as I try to beat the clock, and I stretch while I work. I read that a doctor said women could work out cleaning their homes if they got their hearts pumping and stretched while they moved, so that is my goal each day. It's working wonderfully!
As I've worked hard this summer at practicing this system, the goal was to be done by 9:00 a.m. on my first two morning routine cards so that I am ready to start school. Then I will go to my afternoon card after school is finished.
Swishing down the bathroom each day is so much easier than scrubbing it each week. I swish down the tub when I take a bath each day. So much easier this way. And then once a week I put a "scrub the tub" on one of my kid's chore lists.
Dust mopping is wonderful. My grandmother used to use a dust mop. It's very fast, just like a feather duster. Then you just shake it out after each use. So some days I sweep, and some days I dust mop.
As many of you know, I give my kids three chores a day and one recipe to prepare for the day. My older boys have to leave early for school and work, so they have to make their beds and make their own breakfasts and lunches. They also have an outside chore for their dad during the week that has to be completed. The two younger ones will complete 8 chores for me (including two recipes for the day) every day. Imagine, when they were all being homeschooled, I had 16 chores a day being completed including four recipes! I loved all the productive activity. My husband was so right years ago when he told me that I needed to learn how to harness all their energy. ~Smile~
Starting my dinner in the morning frees up my whole day. And it's Biblical! (Read Proverbs 31 about how she gets her food going very early.) I have also been practicing menu planning all summer. So I plan out my meals for a week the day before I go shopping (using the specials in the ads sent to my home) and write them down on my calendar. Then I store the recipes for that week in a little folder in my kitchen desk for quick retrieval each morning. I also note on the calendar the day before if I need to take out any frozen meat for the next day. This helps to save money, and you'll find that you'll be much more creative with your meals. As you know, I love to try a couple of new meals a week. Never bored in the kitchen that way.
The 15 minute zone work is great. I have my zones on the back of this white card. Here is the schedule for my zones. As I said before, you need to check out the Flylady's website if you don't quite understand what I am talking about. She also has written a book that you can buy from the website. If you don't have internet access (like me), you can access her site at your local library.
Week One: Kitchen
Week Two: Living room & one of the kids' rooms
Week Three: Kitchen & Back room (28 Boogie Fling)
Week Four: My room and the bathroom
I put the kitchen on there twice as it needs the most cleaning out of all the rooms in my house. So for 15 minutes from Monday to Friday, I work 15 minutes in my zone. This week I am in the kitchen, so I spent 15 minutes today cleaning my kitchen ceiling. By the end of the week, I will have clocked in 1 hour and fifteen minutes on this zone. After practicing this all summer, I see such an improvement in each room. It's just amazing what 15 minutes can do with a zone planning system.
The 28 Boogie Fling is when I go through our home with a big bag and give away unnecessary things, outgrown things, unused things, etc. It keeps the clutter from going overboard, which is quite probable in my house since I am a clutter bug and collector. I find that I oftentimes get rid of much more than 28 things, which I think is the idea. But it helps to have it scheduled each month on a certain week.
And I love the timer! It's a wonderful way to get something done quickly which you thought would have taken much longer. It's also a wonderful way to work out your body as you try to beat the clock. The timer is so helpful.
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Second White Card: Afternoon Routine
1~ Take a 20 to 30 minute nap.
2~ Shape my bread and let it rise.
3~ Put out any hot spots.
4~ Catch up on dishes.
5~ Make a green drink.
6~ Set the table.
7~ Sweep the kitchen.
8~ Check "To Do" List and finish items.
9~ Write "To Do" list for tomorrow.
Since I start so early in the morning, I oftentimes need a nap in the early afternoon. It's very refreshing. Even just 20 minutes or so is quite refreshing.
Putting out the hotspots is a term the Flylady uses for going around your house and putting anything back where it goes. It usually only takes a few minutes, then everything is tidy again. I'll call my kids in and have them do a "five minute hotspot treatment" on their room.
I like a green drink to help with my health. I just blend it up in my blender. I've shared the recipe before at www.lainesletters.com
I've learned to make a "To Do" list for each day. Oh, how I didn't want to do this one. But I can't imagine managing this home without it now. I check my calender and see what I'm having for dinner the next day, jot down what I need to do for the preparation of dinner, write what chores I have for that particular day, and what 15 minute zone chore I have to do, and then anything else unusual that I need to remember. It's wonderful to have everything notated the day before, so when I get up I am ready to go and know exactly what is going on. I also pray every day over all that I need to do. I try not to write more than six things on my To Do List, otherwise it is just too overwhelming. And I try to have this list completed by the end of the afternoon. If not, I will have to add it to the next day, and I really don't want to do that!
Now on the back of this card is my chores for each particular day. As I said, I work harder on Monday and Friday. The reason for this is to prepare myself for the week with Monday being the foundational day for the week of my work. Friday prepares me to be available to my husband on the weekend. Here are my chores by days, which I transfer to my "To Do" List each day and oftentimes put on my children's individual chore lists.
Monday:
Vacuum & dust the house
Water inside and outside plants
Make granola
Write weekly menu & make a shopping list
Sort & put away clothes
Tuesday:
Clean the church
Post Office and Food Shopping
Mop the hallway
Emma's eggs (we have an egg delivery)
Windex the stove
Wednesday:
Mop kitchen
Windex microwave
15 minute Procrastination Day (this is when you work on something for 15 minutes that you've been putting off)
Vacuum car
Wash car
Use the carpet sweeper and feather duster through any rooms that need it ( a carpet sweeper is a wonderful investment to fly through a room to tidy it without having to pull out the vacuum; I bought mine at a thrift shop)
Thursday:
Sort and put away clothes
Windex stove
Pay bills and balance checkbook
Clean purse
Friday:
Water plants inside & out
Scrub bottom & sides of tub
Vacuum & dust house
Clean fridge
Wash towels & sheets
Make beans, rice, & salsa for the weekend
Marinate meat for the weekend
Saturday: Fun Day with Art & kids. Church.
Sunday: Rest & Refresh. Church.
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Third White Card: Night Routine
1~ Clean table and wash dishes with kids.
2~ Take a bath and relax.
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I like to relax with my husband at night, and if I've worked wisely through my day, that is now possible. I am no longer trying to play catch up at night when I am the most tired. Rather, I am relaxing with Art and the kids. I never would have dreamed it possible!
Also, I found that my house was now company ready for the many guests that visited us this summer. No more, "Oh no, Aunt Martha is coming!" Then a cleaning frenzy would ensue making me crazy and unable to enjoy guests, especially overnight guests, because my house was so out of control most of the time. Now I really enjoy my guests because my house is ready for them at a moment's notice, especially the many friends my kids bring through during the week. It is so nice to welcome them to a more orderly home with something good to eat. No more spring or fall deep cleaning, rather a little bit of cleaning here and there each day for 15 minutes in my zones. I find that each zone gets better and better each time another week rolls around to work in them.
It took me years to get into some really bad habits. It took me years to learn my way out of them. As I've told you before, I had a lot of household debt. Just like financial debt, it takes years to pay it off and learn how not to do it again. But the more you pray and practice at something good, the better you get at it. Just like my daughter with her cake decorating and my son with his piano practicing. It does no good to whine and complain, which I practiced for years. But it does a world of good for your family to learn how to change bad habits into good ones. I am going to try to help my husband set up zones and daily jobs for his work outside on our landscaping. He has seen such an improvement in our home, especially in my attitude, that he is ready to map out a plan with me for his work here outside in our garage and on our landscaping.
"Do everything without complaining or arguing."
I hope this system helps you as much as it has helped me. Start with just the foundational card and work slowly up from there. It's like running, you don't start off running fifteen miles in a marathon, rather ten or twenty minutes to build up strength. Don't get discouraged. I am giving two years of work to you, plus a harvest of time for the past three months of this summer, because I begged God to help me with my home. He sent me the Flylady's plan, and it hasn't been the same since. I am so thankful that I didn't give up, but kept praying, persevering, and practicing. To this day. How the LORD has helped me! I can run faster now. ~Smile~
"She girds her loins with strength."
It's an ongoing process of learning, strengthening, and building for the glory of God.
"Every wise woman builds her house."
I would have never believed that I could see this much improvement in my home. I am looking forward to this school year. I'm praying for the best one ever. God bless you as you seek His glory in all you say and do.
Love,
Laine
Wow, such wisdom. I am so glad you posted this past letter. I have been trying to set up flylady's routine and this will help me so much.
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